Seeing Red
I'm seeing red
Don't think you'll have to see my face again
Don't have much time for sympathy
Coz it never happened to me
Your feeling blue now
I think you bit off more than you could chew
And now its time to make a choice
And all I wanna hear is your...
“Seein’ Red” Unwritten Law
Kyou remembered quite clearly the first time Akito struck him. He was not much older than eight or nine when he said something that offended the head of house and he slapped him across the cheek as a form of punishment. Of course he did not cry in front of Akito, but let lose a stream of tears only after he was out of the presence of his God. Even when Akito could not see him crying he felt a little stupid for shedding tears, he was allowed to see Akito and, at the time, he admired his God more than he admired anyone else in the one. He wanted to be someone strong with power that everyone loved, not hated. He wanted to anyone but the Cat, he wanted to be someone who could fit in, who had family that actually cared about him, that did not blame him for his mother’s death.
Now he was older now, by quite a few years, and at a New Year’s feast. As usual, he was not enjoying himself. The rest of the cursed one’s were doing what they did best and mingling, most of them anyway, but Akito seemed to be keeping his distance as per usual. Years later, Kyou did not admire the head of house as much as he did when he was younger. He saw Akito and saw someone people did not always love because they wanted to love him, but someone that they had to love, persuaded by fear. Why would anyone want to be loved only because they felt obligated to? He knew he would not know any love, outside of the love Kagura seemed to have for him but that was one sided, because of what he was, but beggers can be choosers.
When Akito left the main room and started to call each of them in one by one Kyou had a feeling he would be ignored again this year. It was pretty common that all of the cursed ones besides him would be called into see Akito if only for a moment or two and he would continue to try to ignore the whispers that seemed to follow him whenever he went to the main house. Yet when the maid came over and gestured for him to follow her, all eyes were on him. He stood and wiped his hands on his pants and followed the maid into the darkened room. She closed the door and Kyou once again found himself alone with his God.
Akito moved slowly away from the opened window that was letting in the winter air and Kyou found himself wondering if it was wise for him to be in such cold weather wearing informal clothing. The God had changed and was now wearing a simple kimono instead of the suit he had on earlier. Akito had poor health, that was well known, and he wondered why he even cared if the older man got sick at all.
“Have you made any progress in defeating, Yuki?” Akito asked without looking at him and Kyou felt every one of his nerves light on fire. Not only did the mention of Yuki’s name make his blood boil, but how nonchalant Akito was with the statement made him angry. His freedom was on the line; this was not some small bet one could brush aside so easily.
“No.” He replied, struggling to keep his voice even, “But I will beat him.”
“We shall see, won’t we?” Akito commented, looking over at him for the first time, “But you’re wasting you’re time, you won’t be able to beat him. That’s just the way things are Kyou, you should learn to accept it.”
“I won’t accept it. I can beat him and I will beat him, I won’t let you lock me up without a fight, not without trying.” Kyou replied, the anger he was feeling leaking into his voice. Akito stood and moved with his normal grace over to him, tilting his head slightly and looking him up and down.
“Why do you always look so dirty whenever I see you?” He asked, sneering and touching his shirt with his fingertips. Against his better judgement, Kyou swatted Akito’s hand away from him.
“If I look so dirty then don’t touch me.” He snapped and it was the back of a hand struck the side of his face and knocked him off balance, causing him to fall to his knees, that Kyou realized it was probably not the wisest idea to swat Akito away like. Although he hated to admit it, they both seemed to have the fact that hated these family gathering with a passion, The tender skin of his cheek burned and he stayed down, stayed on his knees, knowing that if he did anything else he would end up like Hatori.
“You’re learning, maybe you aren’t as stupid and hot headed as I thought.” Akito said, his voice nonchalant again and he saw the older man kneeling down in front of him, arms pulling him into a gentle hug. “You’re my monster, Kyou, but I’ll continue to let you chase these futile dreams of freedom. Just remember, no one else will ever have nor want you, that’s why I have to have you.” He felt soft lips press against his forehead. “Go off and train as hard as you can for another year, Kyou, fight for your freedom, it’s all you have left.” And the warmth of Akito’s thin body was gone and Kyou was suddenly how aware the room was compared to the burning of his cheek. Vaguely, he heard Akito say he could leave and he did not waste a moment to do so, pushing the doors open and leaving without looking back.
No one, not even Kagura or Yuki, asked him about the apparent bruise that was already forming on his cheek, He had not realized how hard Akito had hit him, but he was too busy pushing away the edges of red that clouded his vision. Something about how arrogant Akito seemed when he said he belonged to him, that the God was all the Cat had left in this world. Excusing himself from the main room and secluding himself, Kyou could not help but wonder if there was something more for the Cat in this world.
I confess, I don't know what to make from all this mess
Don't have much time for sympathy
But it never happened to me
You're feeling down now
I don't know where I'll be when you come around
And now it's time to make a choice
And all I wanna hear is your voice
“Seein’ Red” Unwritten Law